Lifestyle · Relationships · Sex · urban youth

My open relationship!

Wanna judge me? By all means, go ahead… I hope you can add it to your resume that you also do a good job in judging people!

Yes, I am in relationship and very much so-happy and content! Following a conversation this morning in a local radio station, a host asked his co-host, “how could you possibly get all you want in one person?”

His co-host went ahead and said “as an idealist and realist human being, it is not possible.” *pauses for a while then we hear a but…*

I am in an open relationship. Does my man know about this?

Yes he does.

Started a while ago when I was with my boy friend. We were just chilling and enjoying each others company when I decided to tell him that I was physically attracted to another guy! Initially when we started dating, of all agreements, policies whatever you’d call them, one thing we decided to stand for is honesty! The truth! No matter what and regardless of how much it would hurt…

I went ahead and asked if I’d tap that, and he said yeah!

He gave me freedom! This relationship is not a prison. He gave me room and space to be myself unapologetically. He wasn’t about to tie me down-like (I cannot do what makes me happy or control me)

“People are going to do what they want regardless of being told NO or YES! And if you cannot trust someone you claim to be in love with, why be with that person at the very beginning?” That he mentioned.

We live in a new era and my kind of current relationship goes beyond the normal, traditional, old school, monogamous relationship. Note, I said relationship not marriage. Now wanna come at me? come at me with facts and where it’s cast on stone that relationships MUST be monogamous! If you can’t, sit down and be humble.

I think it all starts with being honest with oneself and being comfortable with ones’ darkest desires, secrets etc. If I could speak them to self, then I could comfortably speak them to my boyfriend. Also, there is the aspect of being responsible with personal decisions and knowing that every decision, every choice made, carries with it, pros and cons!

We sit at a place where we are candid with our expectations. Boundaries are a thing and they are clearly stated. It is okay to have that real connection but then again we do not, rather I do not shy away from having other real experiences. There is no right way to love someone…you just do!

It again doesn’t mean my partner is flawed…or for him, I’m sure goes beyond. It’s just a journey full of adventure. It’s unconventional, but its us!

It doesn’t have to be physical! Mine is though…This is dependent on what I hold dear to me. Remember this. Then, it should pretty much make sense…


It makes me happy. It makes me sleep at night! It does for someone else as well and at the same time it might not work for you!


10 thoughts on “My open relationship!

  1. Thought provoking. Makes me ask myself, why do people “cheat”? Let me rephrase, why do people “look out?” Why do we feel the urge to be with someone else sexually when in a relationship?

    hehehe you’re good… I think we should mainstream some of these things. Being advocates of choice and all.. What is love all about? Sex or emotion? I think it is emotions.. sex is a completely different issue… for me it is physical.

    Sometime back a girl asked me: “Ken, does it feel different to sleep with someone else while still in a relationship with another? Do you feel the same way when you sleep with both of them or is it different when you sleep with your girlfriend?”

    I told her sex is not about feelings. its about enjoying the moment and climaxing ultimately…

    Liked by 1 person

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