Relationships · Sex · urban youth

The Side…The Other.

Have we all at some point been the other woman? My skepticism of the other woman has always gotten me thinking that maybe we all have been that woman at some point in life, that we have been that woman who some of us loathe and find distasteful. Now there are two realms to it; if you were aware that there was a main, or you were completely in the dark thinking you were the main…

Their commandments.

  • It’s just for sex. Like bomb ass sex…Or men, it isn’t so?
  • Shouldn’t obsess over the main
  • He gets in touch with you first cause you are not friends with benefit but you are his side like SIDE ….
  • Holidays, family gatherings and birthdays (well his birthday) aren’t your occasions.
  • Questions and having the “talk” shouldn’t come anywhere close to your mouth.
  • You don’t compare yourself to the main girl cause you’ll never be the main girl.
  • you don’t get mad when something comes up and so he can’t make to meet you as earlier planned.
  • He dodges every photo and doesn’t want to be tagged nothing on his social media platforms.
  • Ooh, he gets disconnected when you start getting emotional and stuff?? Girl it was about time you knew your place in the society!!!

The list is endless…but question is do you feel guilty or nah?

2 realms again. Okay? In the light or not…

You are not to be blamed for how you feel. Simple! Wanting to have a connection leading to intimacy cannot be disregarded. Where some of us may be going wrong is when it comes to actions and expectations. You simply can’t go ahead and pursue “it” if you know that there be another shawty in the picture. That’s not cool and right either. Stick to your lane.

Now, be a little selfish and think about yourself and how you feel and all your ethical guidelines as a being! If it is in tune with your anatomy, mind, body and soul and totally cool with the situation, that there is another woman, STANDING OVATION TO YOU! You wanna go with the flow and see where is gonna lead you? Fine! Whatever makes you happy but, BUT remember whatever the outcome, you hold yourself SOLELY responsible.

Can you feel guilty for someone else? Like try put yourself in the mains shoes and see if you could actually fit? Well sorry, you actually can’t fit cause you are uuhm the other woman, the side…If you want to remain in the shadows and come second to someone, Cool. Wonder what your mum would think though…Its not your responsibility to fix other people’s relationship issues..but if you were the one you would be the one! Not the second.

Are you aware that you are replaceable? Yes, No?  Now that is your reality. If he could get you still with his main in mind, then he could find another you in no time! Imagine you are someones dirty little secret…(ouch). See, you are like a cheat day. Only indulge cause of a craving then once the craving is gone, you become past tense.

Whose responsibility is it to tell the main that ‘hello I’m here, I’m the side bae..’ you or the man? Like I’m giving your man something you aren’t…could we co-exist? Feelings and choice have a thin line to them…

Well in conclusion, I’m not judging or hating on anyone…but one thing I always say is karma does exist…so always play your cards right.

 

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